• David Stojanovic

How to balance your masculine and feminine?

Updated: 2 days ago

Have you ever wondered how to balance the masculine and feminine energy within yourself?

Have you ever experienced that when you are in meditation you feel a lot of energy build up on one side of the body?


Or that when you're in meditation that your body pulls to one side, as if it wants to tip over to the left or right side, for example, or maybe go backward or forwards with your torso?

Does one side of your body feel heavier than the other?


It happened several times during the Vipassana retreats that my torso was pulled to the left, that my body wanted to lie sideways, and that I noticed a lot of accumulated energy on the left side of my head.


To several teachers, I asked why this happens, and what is the reason, one would tell me my body is tired, and want to lie down and sleep.

Another would say it's his energy that you should "note it" and not let it take over the body and change position.

A third would say that the body is not used to sitting for a long time and got tired.


The Vipassana retreats I have done are only in the lineage of Theravada Buddhism and based on their teachings.

Here you are taught when you have settled into a comfortable position to place the back of your left hand in your lap. And put the back of your right hand in the palm of your left, and the thumbs of both hands lightly touch each other.


In a recent Vipassana retreat, I asked the teachers why we should put the right on the left and not the left on the right.

The teachers informed me that Buddha also sat like that and so we should do that too.


And then my search began, I wanted answers about what was happening with my body and what was going on.


Looking back….

All my life I've had trouble following up on something without clearly knowing why and what the reason is.

Just because someone has done something is no reason for me to do the same.


And there I was during that retreat, with the questions that now preoccupied me more than ever before. Why join hands as they teach us, and why do I feel the energy build up on my left side more than before?


I can tell you that this Vipassana retreat, which took place for me for the first time in 2016, was not my first time meditating. My first conscious meditation took place in 2007 after reading The Tibetan Book of The Dead following the very unexpected death of my sister Dijana. Why do I say conscious? Over the years I have learned that I meditated more or less in my youth even though this was not a mindful practice.

As a child, I was always quite withdrawn and I spent a lot of time alone, which is no different than now. But then if I sat alone and was in silence, then I was still and quiet if anyone would ask for something. When I do it now, I know I'm meditating because I often follow my breath and be mindful in the moment.


The Tibetan Book of The Dead caused my interest in Buddhism to grow and I wanted to read more about it. In the early period of 2007, I had my first meditation experience. This has made me realize that in meditation you can experience things for which the human ear was not created.


In the years that followed, I further immersed myself in meditation and went on a quest to find a meditation form that suited me. I ended up in a community where people practiced Zazen. I feigned this for a month or two to learn that this was not for me. I then ended up with several other meditations and sacrificed myself through what I could find in books. Until I finally got into the Kundalini. And found other teachings here that gave me more depth and information.


In the Kundalini, you also learn that if you are a man you cover your left hand with your right hand. And if you are a woman with your left your right.

Why is this?

Every person has masculine and feminine energy in his body.

On the left is your feminine energy and on the right is masculine energy. So as a man you protect the feminine, and as a woman, you protect the masculine.


This information, which came to me during this retreat, made me adjust how I would sit. If Sikhism, where Kundalini comes from, teaches that a man should cover the feminine with his masculine. Why did Buddha cover his masculine with his feminine?

I then changed my sitting position, placing my masculine (right hand) in my lap and my left (feminine) hand on the right.

And then experienced something I hadn't experienced before. I no longer felt the energy in my head (at the forehead) pull convincingly to the left, but was more balanced in the middle of my head at the level of the third eye.


But if I turned my hands around as the teachers taught us, I could feel the energy moving convincingly to the left.

Well, I have to tell you, I know that my feminine energy is more vital than the masculine. And until this day I did not know that by placing the hands in different positions I could balance my inner energy with this.


When you meditate, how do you hold your hands? Do you have them in your lap? Or did you have them as it is taught according to Buddhism, right on the left?

Okay, sit in your favorite position. Cross-legged, or chair, or on your knees.

Place your hands in your favorite position.

Close your eyes. Bring your awareness to your forehead. What do you feel?

Do you notice that you have an energy build-up on one side of the body?

Or maybe you're in the middle? If so, you're in the right place and you can experiment with what happens to your body when you move your hands into different positions.

Do you notice that your energy is accumulating a lot on the left side? How about your hands, left in right or right is left?

What's up with your energy? Where is it?


Play with this a bit and balance individually your feminine and masculine energy individually


If it was for Buddha the right way to sit with right in left, then it doesn't mean it is for you as well the correct way (and maybe it is). Do the test yourself, see which hand should be covering which hand in order to feel your masculine and feminine energy balanced.


Will you let me know how it went for you?

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